She Knows I Am Laughing With Her

Lilly would like people to stop telling me how cute she looks in bows.

She would also like me to stop matching her bows to her pink (rat-like) skin tone.

She also would like someone to drop a baby daughter off for me to torture decorate raise.

She is happy I didn’t give her this old haircut.  No one loved her for two whole months.

But I did do this.  

Come on.  It is too funny!  I don’t even paint my own nails.

She loves attention.

She begs to get her teeth brushed.

The toothpaste is chicken flavored and she is only allowed to eat her dog food.

She might think teeth brushing is a treat.

Abbie Gale

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The Trouble With Trends

I will only let our son wear “this” at home and when no one else is around.

The trouble with trends is they come back.  They are cyclical.  A swing of a pendulum and we go from neons to pastels and from pointy high heels to round toe ballet shoes.

Or a trend can come back because an eight year-old boys saw a picture of a guy with a ponytail and he thought he looked tough.

Peter brought this tassel he found in a drawer and asked me to stick it to his head with one of my “things.”  When I asked him what he meant he held it to the nape of his neck and said,

“Here, like the way some boys have.”

I deserve this after I put my hair “feathers” onto unsuspecting people at a concert, (and then took a picture.)

Are there “good taste” camps that I can send my boys off to?

I think a camp that teaches our kids good taste such as…

– Watching Sponge Bob will ruin any future ability you may have to create anything of beauty.

– Listening to Niki Minage may possibly cause your ears to not be able to distinguish between a cat dying, a jack hammer, or actual singing.

– Crazy hair will only cause you to have 5 years of your life being unable to prove due to picture frames spontaneously combusting upon having to hold that ugly a$$ photo of you from 1989.

– “That song” you think will define your summer and generation will actually be just another summer song that the record producers release with planned calculations and you were simply putty in the radio stations hands.

– That you shouldn’t take any new trend too far or invest in it too heavily, (ehhhem…tattoos) because most things go terribly out of style the stronger that they were in style.

I guess I will just let my boys be who they are and try silly things when they are kids, even if it is wearing curtain trim in your hair.

I shaved the left side of my head in seventh grade.  I looked like Richard Simmons after being hazed at a fraternity house.

I try my best to teach our boys to be who they are and march to their own drum.

I have been repeating this quote a lot lately with twin twelve year-olds…

“Be Who You Are and Say What You Feel Because 
Those Who Mind Don’t Matter 
and Those Who Matter Don’t Mind.”
– Dr. Seuss

So here I am housebound until my child who thinks he is Antonio Banderas moves onto something else he thinks makes him cool.  😉

Thanks for letting me share with you and I hope I made you smile, laugh, think, love, cry or cry laughing.

-Abbie, allthatmakesyou.com

Botox is Really a Marriage Saving Device

Ok, folks.  I have another a confession.

I have visited the Botox fairy a few times, (he is a friend who serves wine on his couch.)  He has been good to me.  More importantly, He has been good for my marriage and my personal relationships with anyone I have to deal with face to face.

If the Mayans are wrong, I will turn forty on “12.21.12.”  I am getting a lot of slack from friends accusing me of staging this whole “Mayan-End-Of-The-World-Thing” so I can be thirty-nine FOR-EV-ER.  It seemed like all my girlfriends were trying the Botox and all of my (pretend) girlfriends on TV had been doing it for years and so I said…

“Sign me up!  All these woman are making me look old!”

The first time “I did it” I didn’t tell my husband, Jim.  I wanted to see if he noticed.  He didn’t but hilariously found a moment to go on a tangent to our boys about how good I look and that “I don’t need any kind of assistance” when they asked why some women on TV look shellacked.  I was dunking and laughing around the corner.  How do you tell him after that?

I don’t think it altered my looks that much.  For me, I am a face maker as I am pretty animated, it is probably just keeping deep grooves from forming between my eyebrows.

Here is what I learned though.

People don’t need Botox for wrinkles.  The real reason why all women should be getting Botox?

Because you cannot make the, “You are such a dumb a$$ face!”

Your husband will instantly think you love him more.

I also cannot figure out why Botox is not being marketed to people with these tag lines…

“Get Botox and make your husband feel like a genius!”

“Botox makes everyone wonder what your secret to happiness is.”

Botox is really missing the mark here.  There is an entire market of people that they haven’t even tapped into.

Even those suffering from mental health issues could benefit from a little Botox love.

“Suddenly, people find me more approachable!”

“It makes the voices in my head stop making the poop face.”

“Why are you looking at me?!!!  Is it because you think I’m pretty?  Do you think I am pretty?”

If this stay-at-home-mom thing doesn’t work out I am sooo going into marketing.

Have you tried any procedures to make yourself feel refreshed or younger?  Would you?  Are you more of an “age gracefully” kind of person?

If you have had Botox, did it go well?  Did you have any problems?  I ended up with a black eye once because I took ibuprofen before the injections for a tooth ache.   I looked so cute with my black eye.

No other mammas gave me any lip at the bus stop.  I looked so tough with my black eye and scary emotionless face.  Yet another benefit of the Botox.

Abbie, All that makes you… at allthatmakesyou.com 

Even spicy buffalo sauce, coffee flavored beer and Nevada excitement did not cause a forehead wrinkle!  I don’t look a bit crazy, do I?